I read a lot too. I have read all Sidney Sheldon books.

I am experiencing a strange phenomenon in Chandigarh. Here everyone has started to believe that they know more about everything than you do. You could be anyone, been anywhere but they still know more about it than you do. They don't bother to confirm with you, they just know. It happens everywhere and all the time, and now I have stopped reasoning with people here. I let them stroke their ego and lecture me, while I laugh at them in my head. The problem of course, is that you are the only one in on this joke, and it stops being funny after a while.

In the last few weeks, I have been given instructions on; how to do online trading (I have been trading for the last 5 years), how to work out in the gym (the trainer assumed I had never seen the inside of a gym and talked to me like a 5 year old), what jeans to wear for my body (after I had specifically asked for a certain Levi style which the sales person condescendingly told me is not right for me), use of a sunscreen (every time I visit a beautician) and many more. One time someone at the airport started telling me how airports at other countries were better than in India. It was not a discussion or a statement, but a education for me on what facilities are provided at international airports. The person didn't bother to check if I had ever been to one, before making a fool of himself. Another time a salesperson tried to sell me baby wipes when I was looking for a pack for tissues, convincing me that it was the same thing.

While I try to attribute most of it to the know-it-all attitude of the people here in general, but I have to wonder if I look particularly stupid that everyone feels the need to educate me. No amount of self-confidence can withstand this onslaught of unsolicited advice. So after being told everytime that my skin is a mess and so ugly, I do find myself booking an appointment for an expensive facial against my better judgement. Or take that stupid fitness test in the gym, that only made way for more lecturing on how I have let my body go to waste.

Now I mention specifically the people of Chandigarh for this behaviour based on my own experience. It might have spread to (or from) Punjab, but hey! what do I know?

With friends like these, who needs cats?

Here is an actual conversation with a friend. She is married and smug - enough said.

Friend: Chahal, I want you to get married. I want you to be happy.

Me: Clearly you have never met any of the millions of unhappily married people.

Friend: I worry that you might become one of those old women living in a tiny apartment with a bunch of cats.

Me: I am not a fan of cats. I might actually kill myself before I become a crazy cat lady.

Friend: Thank God. Promise?

Me: Oh I was joking. So you would rather see me dead than with a cat?

Friend: I think so. Yes.

Me: If I were a cat, I would be deeply offended.

As she sat there in the golden glow of the sun looking at the summer foliage, small beads of sweat trickled down her flushed face

In the books that I have read from time to time, I have noticed that the summer is many a times written rather poetically. One word that has often been used to describe the weather is 'balming'. Reading books about the balming summer in the south would always bring images of sitting on the porch and drinking lemonades. This world might not seem completely comfortable but it was pretty and nostalgic nonetheless.

Now I am in Chandigarh and it is hot here, hotter than I remember from my earlier years. There is a porch, there is lemonade and it is what they might call balming, but there is nothing fucking poetic about it. So to all the writers who want to write about summer but have clearly never lived through one, here is my tip. If you want your readers to really feel what your characters are supposed to be feeling, next time you write about summer, mention phrases like sweaty clothes, smelly bodies, blotchy skin and never ending wait for the rain (Yes - we wait and hope even if there is not a single cloud in the sky).

And refrain from making your characters touch each other, unless you want it to lead to melting flesh and emergence of zombies. Ok? Ok.

Look who just showed up

Hey God. Can I have word with you?

OhMyGoditsGod: I figured you would want to.

When I moved to Boston, I thought it was going to be a great time of my life. If my plans had come through all the good stories of my life would have started with "when I moved to Boston in 2008...".

OhMyGoditsGod: You kids and your little plans. If I let you run your life, then what the fuck do you think I am doing up here?

But you are God. Aren't you supposed to be bigger than this? You can't be upset with someone like me just because I made plans without consulting with you.

OhMyGoditsGod: I am not upset. I mess with you just for fun. You are my diversion from the world's real problems, you self-indulgent idiot.

But did you have to screw everything up for me? I am now without a boyfriend, soon without a job, no savings and I am going back to live with my parents for a while. It couldn't get any worse, could it?

OhMyGoditsGod: Of course, it could.

How?

OhMyGoditsGod: Well, you could die or something.

I thought you said worse.

OhMyGoditsGod: Do you have any more plans you want me to go over? **Wicked grin**

No Sir. I give up. You kicked my ass. Now could you go focus on someone else for a while?

OhMyGoditsGod: So long kid. Till we meet again.

Take your time. Please.